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How Long Does One Grieve
by Bonnie Moss (c) 2010 -03

Everyone responds  and handles  grief in different  ways. There are 
recommended ways to deal with grieving, but these are just guidelines.

No matter how strong one is, the grief can hurt deeply.It can not be 
drowned in the bottle, lost in celebration or in the company of other 
loved  ones. When the departed has been so much a part of oneís life, 
the pain goes much deeper.

Two years after the death of my husband, I still  feel  moments of  
intense grief,pain and sorrow. Tears still flow down my cheeks  now 
and then, when memories  of  the life we shared  together come flooding
to my mind. These are cherished  moments. I know that I will never hear 
his voice again, nor feel his embrace. I listen to our  favourite music  
alone. Sometimes I hear him humming to the tune.

How long can this go on? People will say move on. Each day is a step 
to moving on. Some days are slower than others.I follow all the steps 
to keep my sanity.Keep a routine, exercise, get out of the house, meet 
with friends, stay active and healthy, throw a party and keep up with 
your hobbies, etc. etc.

Coming home to silence does not bother me anymore. There is no Eric to 
welcome me home, to ask how things went.If there is a problem around the 
house, I take care of it. There is no one to consult. I am now used to 
eating my meals alone. I got very sick last November, yes, I missed Eric 
terribly. Remembering the little things he did when for me I get sick made 
me feel worst. He sure took good care of me. 

I am a night owl. Sometimes, I dread nightfall. Evenings can be awfully long.
I know I now walk alone. Itís a mighty long and lonely walk.

A Final Goodbye


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